本文声优:FISH

"I worked as abartender/waitress at a bar inside an upscale health-foodgrocerystore (it's a real thing, I promise). Most of ourclientelewas well-offretireesand 30-something recently divorced men hoping to get a date with someone coming in after a yoga class. Generally a nice group of customers, but definitely rich, uptight people. Forgetting to bring salt to some might be a huge offense, but automatically bringing it causes others to give you a lecture about sodium intake. It was a difficult balancing act.
“我曾在一家高档健康食品杂货店里面担任酒吧的酒保兼服务生(真的是健康食品,我保证)。我们的大多数客户是富裕的退休人员和30岁刚离婚并希望与一个刚上完瑜伽课的女人约会的男人。基本上都是些很友善的顾客,不过都真的有钱,而且要求比较高。忘记给他们送上盐可能会引起他们的强烈反感,但拿了盐的话他们又会给你上一门有关钠摄入量的课。这个动作的轻重真的很难拿捏。”

"It was St. Patrick's Day. There was also a March Madness game with the local university team playing and we were short-staffed. Needless to say, it was aninsaneevening with me rushing around servingcornedbeef and cabbage, pouring Guinness, and making sure no one was becomingbelligerent.
“那天是圣帕特里克节,当时正在进行“疯狂三月”的比赛,当地大学的校队有参加,我们人手不够。不用说,这是一个疯狂的夜晚,我不断奔波着为客户提供腌牛肉和卷心菜,以及吉尼斯黑啤酒,并确保没有人要斗殴。”

"For some reason, the bar supervisor always liked to have food specials on display for people to see. While I get the concept, it generally just caused us to get mean looks when we told people they probably shouldn't eat it, as it wasn't a sample and had been sitting out for hours. Since it was St. Patrick's Day, we had a giant display of the corned beef and cabbage dinner special, complete withgravy, potatoes, and Irish beer bread.
“由于某些原因,酒吧主管总是喜欢把特荐美食陈列出来给人看。虽然我懂这是为什么,但这对于我们(服务人员)来说真的很麻烦,总是让我们糟人冷眼,因为我们必须告诉顾客这些不是试吃品,而且它们已经被放在这里几小时了。由于当时是圣帕特里克节,我们摆出了大量的腌牛肉配卷心菜特餐,并且还配有肉汁、土豆和爱尔兰啤酒面包。

"As the night was beginning to slow down, I had an older couple sit at the only open seats --adjacentto our food displays. I was clearing tables and leaned over to let them know I'd be right with them, and a plate slid off the mountain of dishes I was carrying,ploppingright into the food display. The 12-hour-old gravy and potatoes somehow still had some fluidity to them, and flew up, then dropped… right into the man's lap.
“随着当晚的高峰期开始结束,我让一对老夫妇坐在仅剩的空位上----与我们摆出的食物相邻。当时我正在清理桌子,但身体也向们倾斜好让他们知道我马上会去他们那里,就在这时,手里堆在最上面的一个盘子滑落了,正好砸向了陈列出的食物。那保存了十二小时的肉汁和马铃薯不知怎么居然还没凝固,溅了起来,而后又掉落,不偏不倚落到了男人的膝盖上。

"I washorrifiedand apologizingprofuselywhile trying to set down the mountain of dishes. The man looked up at me and said, 'I just have one thing to tell you.' He slowly leaned in -- at which point I was thinking he was about to spit in my face -- and he said, 'I don't have tofartanymore, you scared it out of me.'
“我顿时感到了惊骇,一边放下手里堆积如山的盘子一边不停地道歉。那个男人抬头看了我说道,‘我只想告诉你一件事。’他慢慢将身体倾斜------当我以为他要向我脸上吐唾沫时------然后他说,‘我终于不用再放屁了,你已经把它吓出来了。”

"It was the laugh I needed that night, and he wouldn't even let me give him a free beer as an apology." -- Belinda Farragut
“于是我开怀大笑了起来,而这正是我当晚需要的,他甚至不要我给他免费的啤酒作为道歉。”------Belinda Farragut

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